The Second Date Cometh........well maybe

Hey kids!! Mama is baaaaaaaaaaaaaacck!
Sorry for the small hiatus but a little something called Fall Premier Week was happening and sad but true there was a lot of must see programming that I just couldn't stand to miss! Glee (so funny), Survivor, ANTM, Gossip Girl.....ahem..ok let's get back on track and focus on why I'm really here....DATES. So last time we chatted the latest buzz was about Big Ben. Well...after what I would rate about a 9 on a scale of 10 for first dates, Big Ben left for a business trip for 2 whole weeks! While Big Ben was away, we managed to keep in touch with each other via email which was a very welcomed and nice surprise. Fast forward two weeks to Saturday, September 19th, and based on my calculations the eagle has landed and is back in town as of today. Now...think you already know where I am going with this....the part of dating that I loathe and that drives so many of us over the edge and running to the nearest pint of ice cream, baked good, chocolate bar or in my case a bottle of wine.....the infamous Second Date Phone Call!! While my instincts tell me that things were great and I would definitely welcome a second date.....my alter dating ego, which thanks to all of my trusty dating and relationship guides wonders hmmm....maybe he's just not that into me?!? The old me before I started on this lofty and ambitious quest to find the ultimate relationship and l-o-v-e by going out on 100 Dates would have rationalized every way from Tuesday why I haven't received a call for a second date yet. Come on girls....you know what I'm talking about...."Maybe he hasn't called because he's jet lagged" or "Maybe he's so tired and just catching up on his sleep" or "Maybe he left his phone on the plane and can't find a way to reach you..lol" or "Maybe you're jinxing it by talking about it!" and another classic one, "Maybe he likes you so much he's nervous and is waiting for you to give him the right signal that you're interested in him!" Blah..blah..blah..now before starting this blog I think I may have fallen victim to one of those dumb ass excuses just to stroke my ego and make myself feel better but now I am armed with many options AND the advice from the supreme relationship Gods...I know better damn it! Now many of you may be thinking....Stop! Wait! It's only been one day!!!! While I'm not one for drastic measures, I am officially prepared to call a T.O.D=Time of Death (thanks for that one Natalie..love it), on Big Ben after sun down on Sunday....ahhhhhh.

'Sunrise...sunset...sunrise..sunset....'

So clearly I've got some serious dating to do, the days are flying by and I've got LOTS of dates to catch up on. I will give you a small peek into what's on tap for me: Speed Dating event coming up soon, 4 set ups still waiting in the wings, and 90% away from securing a date with a brand new suitor. So even though you haven't heard from me in the last week due to my budding new relationships with the CW, Fox, and CBS, I have still been earnestly working on finding that special guy that will appreciate and share me with my prime time network men for the Fall season. Oh...and a new relationship will bud this week with ABC..can we say 2 hour premiere of Grey's Anatomy?? And before I get any flack about television and the fact that a plastic remote and 1080i won't keep me warm at night or walk me down the aisle......YES I have a DVR!!

Yikes....only 3 months left in the year...I recently read something about Black Friday specials already!! Stay Tuned...........................

Damn You Facebook!!!!!

So I must digress from my mission of 100 Dates for a moment as I sit here in a small state of SHOCK. Ok....so for all of you Sex and The City fans remember the episode when Carrie was at a Fourth of July party in the Hamptons and bumps into Big and finds out that he met someone while he was away on business in Paris?? Now fast forward to the other episode where they decide to bury the hatchet and maintain their "friendship" and Carrie learns over lunch that Big is a lot more serious than what she thought....i.e... he was engaged?!!?!??! Well..I just had a little Fourth of July/Bury the Hatchet moment of my own folks....and who or what is to blame do you ask.....boredom, Facebook, and a little red wine on a Saturday night! Yes...just discovered that a guy that I dated in NYC..on and off, off and on, off then on, for about 3 years in NYC is now MARRIED. The quintessential bachelor that I never thought even knew how to spell the word let alone do the deed is married. A big F***ing thanks goes out to Facebook for allowing me to bear witness to countless status updates and wall postings and well wishes from friends and family...can we say TMI??? Hmmm guess there is something to that catchy book turned blockbuster movie, "He's Just Not That Into You" which also just happens to be my Buru of the moment:

Rule #7: He's Just Not That Into You If He Doesn't Want to Marry You........

Damn you Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo...........you are so right on.

3 months, 2 weeks, 4 days and 94 dates to go....ahhhh..where's my big clock???? [refer to last post to explain "Big Clock"]

Date #6: Tennis, a little Vaseline, and a Big Clock

Picture it….a cool Sunday afternoon sitting outside at The Alcove in Los Feliz sipping on a non fat latte having interesting conversation….ahhhh. So not only did I have Date #6 this past Sunday but I also enjoyed a Golden Girls marathon (only a die hard GG fan would understand the “picture it” reference…kudos to you). On to Date #6…..and yes, he is the bi product of yet another online dating resource compliments of Match.com. Now at first glance from his profile picture I have to admit that I was a little shallow and my expectations were not the greatest based on his picture but I liked his 'stats': 36, athletic, wants kids, never been married, social drinker, graduate degree, and is passionate about his job. The fact that his picture looked as if he used Vaseline instead of some fancy exfoliating cleanser to wash his face was just a small formality right? We exchanged a few emails with each other and he had a pretty good sense of humor...well good enough to appreciate my sassy yet goofy attitude that only a mother could love. While I am a big fan of the game of tennis, I am not one for engaging in a tournament of emails with a potential date..i.e.. a barrage of emails about our life stories back and forth, back and forth, back and forth....match point already!! Ahhhh....enough about tennis and Vaseline (sorry Serena) on to details about the date!!

So after a few technical difficulties in communicating with each other (as if we don't have enough ways to be in touch AND get rejected these days....cell, text, im, bbm, facebook, voice mail, email..think you get it) after HE was an hour late we finally connected with each other in Los Feliz. I know you're all dying to know his 'name' aren't you?? Well #6 and I had a really engaging conversation about race, fashion, and the financial world.....I can't think of 3 subjects that link better together can you? Hmmm....President Obama, Fashion Night Out, and a few little names like JP Morgan Chase and AIG...well this wasn't the exact stream of conversation but you get the point. #6 works in the world of finance and corruption ahem..I meant finance and consumption :) and he informed me that he was off to London for business the very next day so I couldn't think of a better moniker for #6 than you guessed it....Big Ben (London, big clock, time, HE was late.....makes sense right?).

I must say meeting Big Ben in person was quite the surprise. Gone was the squinty eyed, grease slicked face from his profile picture and hello to a fresh faced, dimply, bright eyed good looking guy......phew! We ordered our fancy coffee drinks, found a comfortable spot to chat outside and proceeded to engage each other in stimulating conversation. I learned that Big Ben was originally from the East coast, was engaged and involved in a long term relationship for 9 years, and was also somewhat of a newbie to the West coast like me. I found the conversation to be seamless and easy....he served, I hit back, another serve, another hit...no Aces...just an easy and fun game of dating tennis. In fact the conversation was so seamless that we were still engaged on a subject as he was walking me to my car to end the date.

On to the advice...I switched gears and started reading the tome of a new Buru, this week it's a little advice from Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo otherwise known as the geniuses behind "He's Just Not That Into You". Now some of you may think that this first date with Big Ben may be a tad bit too soon to discern whether or not he's into me but I think no time is like the present so I'd like to break a few things down based on the tips from the book and see if my #6 could potentially turn into Dates #'s 7-100:


Rule #1: He's just not that into you if he's not calling you:
First date aside I will say that Big Ben has contacted me via email on 3 occasions whilst away in London for the week. Now only time will tell what stands to happen once he is back on dry land but so far his cyber contact has been cute, funny, and engaging.

Rule #2: He's just not that into you if he's not asking you out:
Although there is a rather large body of water and about a dozen or so States between Big Ben and myself he has managed to ask me out for when he is back in town. Geez...is a trip to the Abbey (and I'm not talking about the one in WeHo for all you Los Angelian's) and a body of water is all it really takes for a guy to seal the deal for another date these days?

Rule #3: He's just not that into you if he's unable to show some type of affection...towards YOU: Now this was a rule of my own that I thought I would throw in for good measure. I happen to be an extremely affectionate person and I have come to realize that being with a person that cannot show affection towards me in a relationship is a DEAL BREAKER for me. And no...I'm not saying that I want to throw down with a guy at a bus stop, waiting in line at Starbucks, or in the Travel section of Barnes & Noble BUT I am a warm, touchy feely kind of person that requires some attention and reciprocity in that department. I once dated a guy in my 20's that would walk 3 steps ahead of me when we were walking down the street.......now with the wisdom of my 30s its safe to say that he just wasn't that into me but at that time like most of us I chose to believe that he really did like me but had an unfortunate rare skin disorder on the palms of his hands that prevented any skin to skin contact. Ahhh Greg and Liz....where have you been all of my life??

So there are a lot more rules to follow in the 'No Excuses Truth to Understanding guys' from "He's Just Not That Into You" which I will revisit once Big Ben resets his clock stateside.......

Stay tuned... :o)

Week 4: From May to December.............

As of last night I have 95 dates to go and if you are paying any attention to that cute little ticker at the bottom of my posts...I only have 3 months, 4 weeks and 1 day left..which means to 118 days to go out on 95 dates!!! Yikes...looks like it's time to ramp it and double book em'!

So back on track to Date #5 which was last evening....ahhh...well, I will first begin by saying that I needed to consult with a few resources in order to find the appropriate terminology if you will for my date last night. Appropriate terminology for my date you ask?? What's she talking about?? Date #5 was a little older than me.....ok..let's be honest he was significantly older than me but age is just a number right? Let's just say that if a Cougar represents an older woman dating a younger man then Date #5 would be considered a 'Tom Cat' and No I'm not referring to Cruise and Holmes although the age gap that they share is a little comparable. So think I'm going to refer to Date #5 as Mr. December....(just call me "May" and he is "December"....are you following??).

I actually met Mr. December through yet another dating site....eharmful..oop's..I meant eHarmony. I initially shrugged off Mr. December's advances as I did feel he was just a wee too long in the tooth for me. While I have dated men in the past that were older than me...in some cases up to 10 years, I just didn't think that Mr. December and I would connect and want the same things out of life due to the significant age gap (keep guessing about that gap because I'm NOT telling!). Well I can say one thing about older men....they are persistent and just won't take no for an answer so after much prodding and having the ability to really make me laugh I conceded and decided to go out with Mr. December.

So I met up with Mr. December on his turf in a cute little beachy town that seemed miles away from where I live even though it only took me about 15 minutes to get there. He was extremely chivalrous and met me outside as I drove up and ushered me to the valet parking lot and paid the parking attendant (Not too shabby eh?). We sat at the bar at one of his favorite haunts where everybody knows his name where he regaled me with hilarious stories of his dating past. So far so good...cocktails, dating stories and most importantly he pursued me with the vigor and drive of a fat kid eating at a dessert buffet. I actually found myself laughing, smiling, and very intrigued by Mr. December's advances and oh so straight forward delivery. Is it me or does it seem like there are only two stages in life when men are able to really let you know how they feel and what they want in life....when they first start learning how to speak ('Mommy I want my bottle, I'm hungry, or I have to go poddy') and when they need to re-learn how to speak because of the new accoutrement's in their mouth's....are you seeing the parallels here??

Overall Mr. December was witty, interesting, funny, direct, and nice company but I must be honest that I'm just not so sure about the age gap. BUT! Before I officially become an ageist I will have another date with Mr. December...in fact stay tuned as we are meeting up next week :0)!

Now I realize that I was a little lax this week on choosing a new Buru to follow this week but don't worry...I just picked a new advisor and the name of the tome is "Good Date, Bad Date...The Matchmaker's Guide to Where the Boys Are and How to Get Them" by Marla Martenson.

Stay tuned...........................

Two Cities, a Gnome, and a Little Frenchman walk into a bar......

As I sit at the cusp of Date #5 watching my deluxe version of Sex and The City the Movie for the 100th time, I thought it would be a good time to do a little reflection and give a few updates for inquiring minds that want to know. Ahhh...so let's take a look back:

Bachelor #1, "Mr. Windy City"
Mr. Windy City was a seemingly normal, average, nice guy, just passed the 4-0 finish line.......with a Roommate......NEXT.

Bachelor #2, "Nawlins"
Nawlins had a slight Southern charm and actually exceeded my initial expectations based on the fact that he suggested we meet at an empty mall for our first date. Ahhh....but in this case...city mouse trumps country mouse. Guess I'd rather experience 'New Orleans' on an actual trip to Louisiana. Moving on....

Bachelor #3, "Napoleon"
Ahhh Napoleon......words really escape me on this one...well kinda. Small guy wearing a big ego suit, the "expired" credit card fiasco, and the laminated bus card (well I'm being a tad dramatic but you get the point!). To make matters even more interesting Napoleon called me a few times this weekend, hmmmm....I can think of a million ways to say "NO": Iya (Japanese), Bukan (Malaysian), Bu Shi (Mandrin), Inehi (Zambia), and my personal favorite..Hell to the NO (Whitney Houston and urbandictionary.com)!

Bachelor #4, "The Roaming Gnome"
Jury is still out on The Gnome...I think. While I didn't feel sparks and butterflies during our date he had a lot of great qualities and may be worth revisiting. This one's for a certain friend living down under...you know who you are ;+).

As much as I wanted to kick back and relax a little this weekend I felt rather inclined to scour the city for dates and as a result I've got 4 pending as we head into Week 4!!! Time to step it up as love waits for no one!! Stay tuned....

Week 3: Red, White, and Phew!!!!......

So, I went out with Bachelor #4 tonight, had TWO cocktails, engaging conversation, AND he didn't need a bus card to get home!! Ding..Ding..Ding!! Phew!....after that train wreck of a date on Monday its so sad that a few mixed drinks and a hunk of steel (the car not the guy) can get a girl a little excited. Ok..so let's get back on track to the Guy, the Scene, and tips from my Buru Giuliani Rancic's dating tome, "Think Like a Guy...How to Get a Guy by Thinking Like One".

The Guy
I met Date #4 on Match.com and we actually exchanged a few emails and a phone call before our date. His emails were short and sweet and to the point but the key thing I learned about #4 before meeting him was his LOVE of travelling...and I'm not just talking about a three hour drive to Vegas or the Grand Canyon but serious world traveler....we like this. So I think the perfect moniker for him is The Roaming Gnome! I mean what says travel more than that cute little Gnome with the pointy red hat from all those Expedia.com commercials and NO he wasn't that little!

The Scene
I took a suggestion from a friend for the spot where we met. Now, I must tell you that one of my dating pet peeves is for the guy to throw the planning of the place/date in the girls lap on the first date....HATE it! I cut him a little slack as he wasn't at all familiar with the part of town where we met and he did the chivalrous gesture of agreeing to meet in my hood, but that's what Citysearch, Yelp, Shecky's, and all those damn iPhone apps are for right? We end up at a place called the "Good Luck Bar" and good luck on stomaching the dimly lit red lights and overabundance of Asian themed decorations...also ALL in red.

Overall I must say that I had a good evening with The Roaming Gnome. I learned a lot of interesting things about him - he is a high school teacher, has travelled the world extensively, compassionate, smart, athletic, and is close to his family. While I can't say that it was like 4th of July with sparks flying during our date (more like Chinese New Year in this bar...) I could honestly see a potential friendship forming with him. I know..I know..I have said this myself oh so many times..."I'm not looking for friends here!" but he was a decent guy and we had a few things in common. I also gathered from conversation that the Roaming Gnome was not seeking something serious at this point (hmm...maybe I need to start reading "He's Just Not That Into You" next...). Perhaps I need to add another column to my 100 Dates spreadsheet...JF = Just Friends?? A followup will be in order for this one......stay tuned.

The Book
And finally the advice. So I read "TLAGHTGAGBTLO" from cover to cover. I highly recommend this book especially to my single ladies. Not only did this book make me laugh out loud (I felt like I was reading a David Sedaris book I was laughing so much!) but the advice was straight up, relevant, and oh so dead on! In fact..the actual prologue of the book was a warning that read: "No bullshit was used in the making of this book. It is honest, sometimes harsh, and can be unpleasant to read. Most important, it's straightforward and to the point." The book highlights a total of #66 tips to follow in order to get the guy, keep the guy, keep the guy excited, and run off into the sunset riding a unicorn....but I will breakdown a choice few for you:

#1- Give Him Your Digits, But Don't Take His
Ok..so I followed this very basic but often broken rule to a tee. During our email exchanges he offered me his phone number and I flipped it right back and gave him mine and patiently waited for his call. It's ALL about letting him make the first move ladies!

#4- It's Your Dirty Laundry Not His
"He's a guy, not your best gal pal. So save your deepest, darkest secrets for the flight back from the honeymoon". Usually a rule like this would be more appropriate for a few more dates but in this case I listed it because of rule #32 (See last rule). The basic premise of this rule is to keep the first date conversation nice and light and to not reveal too much about yourself too early as no one wants to carry around emotional baggage early into a relationship. Save the confessionals for designated GNO's. And once again I get an A for this rule...my date..not so lucky (see Rule #32).

#15-Have a Sense of Humor
"In the land of bar conversation the dirty joke reigns supreme". Sorry to disappoint but no dirty jokes from The Roaming Gnome BUT he had a pretty good sense of humor and told a few stories that if given a score card I would have passed with an A for rolling with the punches and passing the "cool" chick test.

#18-Words Never to Mention on the First Three Dates
According to our Buru there are a 13 words that if uttered on a date could be considered dating suicide and here they are (try to control your laughter please):

Soulmate
Destiny
Rehab
Baby
Disease
Wedding
My Sister's Wedding
Astrology
Therapist
Prozac
Ex-Husband
Restraining Order
Biological Clock

I passed this one with flying colors tonight but sometimes that astrology one gets me. Although, The Roaming Gnome did make mention a few times of his Ex but it wasn't in a "I'm still crazy in love with this woman" sort of way...but take note on who is breaking the rules here..not I!

#32-Never Admit You've Had Plastic Surgery
"Unless he was in the operating room with you, he can't ever really prove it"...preach Giuliana preach!! Ok..so at this point I've probably got all of you sitting on the edge of your seats asking yourself..OMG?!?! Did Diona have plastic surgery?? Yeah...well a girl can dream right? I would have lipo in a hot second if I had the extra cash to blow but let's get back to why I actually posted this rule. I posted the rule because someone else admitted to going under the knife for ahem..a "deviated septum" yes...you guessed it The Roaming Gnome told me he got a nose job two months ago to help his breathing. Well I would like to get some of the fat sucked from between my thighs one of these days to help my "walking"!

So recess is over....stay tuned for more dates and upDates!

Tre, Trois, Trifecta.......Date #3!!!!!!!!!

Ok...what a way to end Week 2 folks...with a date! And this one is almost too good for words...but before I set the scene and talk about the guy I must tell you how Date #3 even came to be (ahh...think I rhymed a little). So I met Date #3 at work....yup...at work. I actually met him about a week ago where we made a little small talk and he proceeded to give me his take on how shallow LA women are....ughh...not this song and dance again. I saw him again today and after a little meaningless chit chat his wandering gaze stopped to focus on my other 'set of eyes' to ask me if I was interested in meeting him for coffee a little later. Not wanting to disappoint you I said what the hell and agreed to a coffee/drink date with him. Ahhh....now its time to get to the 'piece de resistance'!

The Guy
So let's all revisit World History for a second. There was an infamous man whose namesake we still use to this day to refer to a 'certain' type of man and this also just happens to be the best moniker I can think of for Date #3.....you guessed it...Napoleon. I also couldn't resist adding a short (no pun intended) description from Wikipedia just to make sure you get it:

[In 1908 psychologist Alfred Adler cited Napoleon to describe an inferiority complex where short people adopt an overaggressive behavior to compensate for lack of height; this inspired the term Napoleon complex.[152] The stock character of Napoleon is a comically short "petty tyrant" and this has become a cliché in popular culture.]

So on the outside Napoleon was a nice little package...maybe a smidge shorter than me..but his redeeming quality was his nicely formed chest and arms, his interesting accent, and his ability to put up with my sometimes sassy sense of humor. Nice Delts + Nice Pecs + Accent - Height Deficit = Possibility. Ok....on to the scene and a little more of Napoleon sans the Dynamite.

The Scene
We met at The Grove which is a popular outdoor mall/farmer's market/good spot with lots of people, noise, and lights just in case he's a lunatic. I meet Napoleon in front of a popular spot and the minute I see him he informs me that he tried to use his credit/debit card at the cute little restaurant/lounge spot right next to us but was told that the card didn't work because the "expiration" date had passed. Hmmmm.......I am all about giving the benefit of the doubt in situations but after I got a look at the card and that the expiration date clearly stated 7/13, I began to wonder if "expiration date" was a new code word for "declined". I decided to go with the flow and tell him not to worry about it but Napoleon just couldn't let it go...I lost count how many times he said he was pissed about the whole ordeal. At his urging we walked a few minutes to a coffee spot not too far away so that he could try it again. We get in line, order our drinks, and I sit and wait for him in the corner......a few minutes later he's walking towards me...empty handed. Regardless of the total or the date for that matter...looks like the card was still "expired" wink..wink ;). Being the good sport that I am we sat outside and attempted to get know each other a little better......

All I can say is that Napoleon lived up to his moniker by expressing his disdain for meeting women in LA, comparing LA women to women in other parts of the country, complaining, and of course how his main focus and goal is $$$$$. Thank god two firetrucks pulled up at the right moment (A million thanks to the LAFDP and the Universe) as this was a perfect opportunity to play the "curious" i.e..let's go see what's going on card and end the tragedy of this evening with no beverage. Turns out the only fire at The Grove was the one at my feet because they were burning up ready to leave!! Napoleon got my parking ticket validated and walked me to my car as I casually asked him where he was parked.....are you ready for this one....my little wee Frenchman arrived at our meeting spot sans vehicle and NO I did not offer to take him home! To think I could have been at home enjoying a bottle of 2 buck chuck and watching the premier of Rachel Zoe or that new A&E show Hoarders. Tonight I took one for the team....

Well folks....my plan was to share some tips from my latest Buru, Guiliana Ranic, from "Think Like a Guy...How to Get a Guy by Thinking Like One" but this was just too good folks...too good so look for tips soon!

Stay Tuned.....Only 97 dates to go!!!!

**I rushed this post for you Shannon...wanted you to have some juicy reading for your morning routine :0)*****

Week 2: Diona returns from Mecca........

So I'm sure you're all wondering how the trip to 'Mecca' was eh? Umm..so remember my old equation?? Let me remind you:
Single Girl + Wedding /Party Bus = Dates. Well, I have a new one for you:
Single Girl + Wedding on a Yacht for 4 plus hours + Several Dramamine = Diona passed out on a couch right up until the boat docked!
Yup....that was no typo people. One of the bridesmaid's and myself had an ugly aversion to sea travel so to combat our issue we prepared ourselves by popping a few (not one but a few) Dramamine an hour before take off and I popped a few more once I boarded the demon of the sea. Clearly neither one of us realized that drowsiness was a by product of this wonder drug because shortly after dinner and before the night really got started on the dance floor (i.e prime time to boogie down and mingle) we were both OUT like babies after a feeding. Needless to say my attempt to acquire Date #3 was thwarted because I didn't read the fine print on the side of the bottle. So....while my trip to dating Mecca still leaves me at Date #3 and counting ...I still had a fabulous time.

Tina and Tyson...Thanks for a great and memorable evening!!

Week 2 is coming to an end but the dates are still coming! Stay tuned.........

Week 2: A girl needs her rest....and a little reality tv

Ahhhhh...well I decided to take a night off to catch up on a few long awaited TV premiers...Top Chef Las Vegas, Project Runway and Flipping Out and to decide which new Buru's advice I will begin to follow. I have actually been doing my homework and started reading a few new manuals one of which is actually titled "The Manual" by Steve Santagati, which is the bad boy's guide to how men think with that other head, "Think Like a Guy..How to Get a Guy by Thinking Like One" by Guiliana Rancic (formerly DePandi)...hmmm..wonder if Giuliani's tips will help land me an Apprentice that I can call my own (and a little stint on E! wouldn't be too shabby either) or Patty Stanger's new book from Millionaire Matchmaker fame, "Become Your Own Matchmaker: 8 Easy Steps for Attracting your Perfect Mate". So after fumbling through a few pages...I've decided that my next Buru (Buru=Book+Guru for some of you new followers) is going to go the ladies....alright Mrs. Apprentice, I am your clay.....mold me.

AND Date #3 is actually already in the works...it was tentatively going to be tonight (Thursday night) but bachelor #3 is headed East for a few days so we will catch up with him next week! Updates from Mr. Windy City or Nawlin's you ask?? Stay tuned.......

Week 2: 98 and counting......

Week 2...Date #2
Since Date #2 occurred on the heels of the end of Week #1, I decided to use the same tips from Buru Dr. Phil....and besides..it's my blog and dating experiment anyway..I make the rules! And just to give you a sense of timing Date #1 was on Tuesday, Aug 18th and #2 was the very next day, Wednesday, Aug 19th so I've barely got enough time to keep you all updated properly!!

The Guy
Date #2 is also compliments of Match.com...go figure right? Another Match date but I can't tell you how different my first two victi...oops I mean dates are from each other! Nawlin's [New Orlean's pronounced with a lazy tongue] seems like an appropriate moniker for date #2 considering his thick Louisiana drawl and Southern charm coupled with the LA "cool" factor.

The Scene
So before we set the scene I must digress for a moment as there were a few phone conversations prior to our date that I must share.

Conversation #1
Nawlins: "Hey...how are you?"
Me: "Good..how are you?"
Nawlins: "So why are you still single??"
Me: [disconnect]

Ok...so I didn't hang up on the guy for asking that question but I am so SICK of that question so I threw it right back at him! I'm a single, 30 something, eligible woman and clearly there must be something wrong with me since I am still single and trolling for men on the Internet amongst other places...and yes I said trolling!

Conversation #2
Nawlins: "How was your day?"
Me: "Pretty good...and yours?"
Nawlins: "Damn girl....I'm trying to figure out why you are still single!"
Me: "Why do you keep asking me this question Gumbo?? So once again I am throwing it right back at you...why are you still single??"
Nawlins: (And get ready for this one ladies...) "Well I have found that most women in LA are looking for a guy with a lot of drama....lots of baby mama's, kids, drama whatever. I don't have any of that drama in my life and the women here are bored with that."

I mean...where do I even begin here?? I must say that after conversation #2 I was ready to come up with some clever excuse to cancel our coffee date but being the nice person that I am I decided to meet for coffee anyway. I'd like to Oh and I am leaving out a critical tidbit of information here. Nawlin's suggested that we meet for coffee at a Starbuck's...in a Mall...at 9:30...p.s..the Mall closes at 9:00 but apparently people are still roaming about a semi lit empty mall because of the movie theater. Creepy. And really...of all the places in the world to meet for a coffee date...inside a closed mall?? Maybe if we lived in Dubuque or Jackson Hole but we're in Los Angeles for heaven's sake where coffee shops are as common as car washes or boob jobs...they're on every other corner!!!

At this point I think I have scored about a C- according to Dr. Phil's rules but Bush was a C student right?? lol

Because I was so weirded out by meeting a guy from the Internet in a dimly lit closed mall with a questionable amount of people around to hear me just in case I needed to scream and haul ass to the nearest escalator, I kindly suggested that we meet at a coffee spot a few blocks away from the mall. Like a smooth Southern gentleman, Nawlins acquiesced and I met him at the new spot where there were plenty of cars, lights, people, and background noise. Ahhh...dating salvation.

I have to admit that my expectations were pretty low after that second conversation laden with generalizations about LA women, but meeting Nawlin's in person was much better than what I thought it would be and it was actually a pretty decent date. He was positive, had a good spirit, and was passionate about his line of work. While I can't say that my loins were oozing for him and I didn't feel any instant chemistry or butterflies think a second date with him may be in order (will tally total dates later!)....

Stay tuned for tentative date #3....and it's a set up!!

So..............?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Ahhh....the post we've all been waiting for!! Commentary on date #1! Before we get down to the nitty gritty let's set the scene and go over my date check list from Week #1's Buru, Dr. Phil from "Love Smart: Find the One You Want, Fix the One You Got":

The Scene
A cute and intimate bar in Los Feliz (it took me longer than I anticipated to get to the place as it is a new part of town for me and traffic was a bitch so unfortunately I committed a dating faux paus..I was 15 minutes late...ouch!). I called my date en route, apologized profusely and hauled ass to get there!

My date...who I will refer to as 'Mr. Windy City' was sitting at the bar patiently waiting for my arrival. The bar had a decent amount of people but I immediately recognized him from his picture. I was actually surprised as he pretty much looked just like his picture BUT he was also already sitting down at the bar so for a moment I had a flashback of the Sex and The City episode where Samantha meets the guy sitting at the bar, accepts a date with him and when they get up to leave he turns out being 5' feet tall! Y'all....remember that one right?? Well I breathed a small sigh of relief on the inside as he stood up to greet me because in the online world of dating I have found that the following equation tends to hold true: Height from Online Profile less 3 to 4 inches equals actual height of said date, example: match profile reads 6'0 actual height in person 5'7..so true, so true, so true!

Date Prep from Buru #1, Love Smart by Dr. Phil
1 Knowing My Audience:
The audience i.e. "Mr. Windy City" as I like to call him since he spent a lot of time telling me about where he is originally from, Chicago, hence his the moniker Mr. Windy City. I prepared myself by skimming his profile just to get the major points. Mr. WC is 43, looking for a serious relationship, enjoys outdoor activities like hiking and cycling, baseball games and is interested in a woman that can enjoy life's "simple" pleasures...hmm..should have asked him if an afternoon at Barney's New York qualifies as a "simple pleasure" in his book.

2 Knowing My Opening Questions
Since I had a decent idea of my audience coming up with a few questions wasn't too difficult..so the conversation went on like a decent match of tennis...question, answer, serve, question, answer, serve..think you get the point. Oh and Dr. Phil also points out that I should give him ample attention since most folks love hearing about themselves and I quote, "If you spend the whole time talking about yourself, not only will you bore him but it may seem that you're trying way too hard to sell yourself"...really Dr. Phil? I think a nice balance is better but hmmm.. who's the single one in this situation? ME. Think I did a good job of giving just enough about me while managing to make him think it was all about him!

3 Know My Star Power
So Dr. Phil says that the secret to star quality is that it is not about hogging the spotlight and the more generous you are about making other people feel like stars, the more star quality you yourself will possess. I see where Phil was going with this one but on the contrary I thought this tip was filled with a little more BS than the others tips.

4 Know My Sound Bite
If you ask anyone that knows me well I am pretty good at knowing what my sound bite is...not sure what a "sound bite" is..well let me explain it to you. A sound bite is like having an arsenal of great "ammunition" to share about yourself. Something that's positive, upbeat, makes you smile and ultimately makes you more attractive to the opposite sex (or same..no judgments here...NO PROP 8!). No matter what happens to be going on in my life you would often never know out as my "sound bite" tends to be pretty positive and so this is exactly what Mr. Windy City was getting last evening.

5 Know My Fillers
Fillers....these are handful of things (Dr. Phil says you should have 5) that you can always fall back and talk about with anyone with comfort, ease, and confidence. It could be current events, news, politics (although I don't recommend talking about that on a first date...especially if he's an Republican), travelling, hobbies etc..basically a filler is something that you can shoot the sh*t about so as to avoid awkward moments of silence (which I experienced a few last night...so I excused myself to go the ladies room!).

Overall it was a decent date but no sparks :( and oh one more thing the only thing that turned me off about this guy was the fact that he disclosed to me that he has a roommate. Now before you start bashing on me, I can get with a guy having a roommate up to a certain age but I think once you pass the 4-0 finish line I just happen to have an issue with it so there..hate me or not just being real people! At the end of the day I followed all of the big "Do's and Don'ts" of dating...made eye contact, asked questions, was a good listener, blah..blah..blah but alas no love connection..I guess Rome wasn't built in a day so on to the next.....

Stay tuned folks because Date #3 is on deck....yes, you read correctly #3...had a little coffee date tonight (Wednesday) will give more details of bachelor #2 tomorrow as a girl needs her beauty rest!

And on the Seventh Day...........

No rest for the weary my friends....because on the Seventh day I will not be resting, I will be on a DATE! Yes..a date. What an end to week one of Diona Dates The City...now only #99 to go! Umm...was that a little foul of me? I mean I'm already counting down to #99 when you never know, #1 could be THE ONE!! Perhaps I need to put "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man" by Steve Harvey on deck next. So how did I meet lucky #1 you ask?? Well bachelor #1 is compliments of Match.com and I promise more details to follow soon!

Ok kids...keeping this post pretty brief as I will have LOTS to update you on tomorrow.

Stay Tuned.......

Week 1: The Rules (Yes..we are still in week 1)

Ok...so its day 6 of DionaDatestheCity and I have received countless questions and feedback about my quest . The #1 burning question I keep getting is, what is the criteria for a date and how will you get them? Well...let me break it down for you. Let's start with a little lexicon of love so to speak:

Date-noun [as defined by Miriam Webster]
4 a : an appointment to meet at a specified time; especially : a social engagement between two persons that often has a romantic character b : a person with whom one has a usually romantic date

Date- noun [as defined by Dictionary.com]
7. a social appointment, engagement, or occasion arranged beforehand with another person: to go out on a date on Saturday night.
8. a person with whom one has such a social appointment or engagement: Can I bring a date to the party?

Date- noun [as defined by the Average Single Guy] "Any encounter that gets me one step closer to getting laid......"

Speed Date-noun [as defined by Wikipedia]
A formalized matchmaking process or dating system whose purpose is to encourage people to meet a large number of people. Men and women are rotated to meet each other over a series of short "dates" usually lasting from 3 to 8 minutes depending on the organization running the event. The time limit ensures that a participant will not be stuck with a boorish match for very long and prevents participant's from monopolizing one another's time.

So that's 4 different versions of what dating means from a few choice sources. Now here's my take on it and a little insight as to where I will find the lucky 100....

Date- [as defined by ME]
A casual meeting between two people with the purpose of getting to know each other and to discover if there is a mutual attraction and physical chemistry.....

And more importantly where and how am I finding the lucky 100?? Check out the list......and feel free to make suggestions people..........

• Blind Dates
• Set Ups
• Online Dating (Match.com, eharmony.com, chemistry.com, I could go on here but I won't)
• Craig's List (Don't knock it till you try it.....)
• Bookstores
• Coffee shops
• House Parties
• Sporting Events
• Concerts
• Bars
• Clubs
• Hiking
• Dog Park
• Museum
• Shopping
• Driving
• Walking
• Food Shopping
• Pinkberry and Yogurtland
• Home Depot, Hardware Store
• *Speed dating*

"Dating is a number's game..the more men you meet, the more likely you will find your special someone"....compliments of Dr. Phil's Love Smart. While some of you may think that speed dating is cheating, I think at least one of these unique dating experiences will be excellent fodder for conversation AND I have a feeling Dr. Phil would agree as well right? Besides...can you think of a better way to knock out about a dozen dates in one night?? Can't wait to write about this one after it happens.....

Ok folks....I had a pretty productive weekend, translation...I was FMAO (flirting my ass off), so stay tuned for updates...#1 is definitely happening this week!!

Week 1: 12 Winks and a Set Up Away.........

Word is travelling fast about Diona Dates the City and I am getting one step closer (yes...just one step, but we are only 4 days in folks!) to my quest to complete 100 Dates by the end of the year! A big thanks goes out to "K-Bus" (you know who you are) and Facebook for putting me closer to date #1 of #100 (funny how starting a blog about a dating experiment suddenly makes everyone come out of the woodwork's with prospective suitors and blind dates....I mean where was the gift giving spirit prior to all of this?!?!

Now in order to make my quest a little more interesting and broaden my dating pool so to speak I also joined Match.com. I am actually no stranger to online dating. I was on Match.com when I lived in NYC and I must say I had LOTS of crazy and interesting experiences which made for great water cooler conversation in the office....remind me to tell you about my date with a guy that had a strange obsession with a certain famous stuffed bear...weird.


So, I am now 12 winks, a set up, and an email away from date #1 so stay tuned. More on my adventures in the world of online dating on the next post as this requires some serious focus and details for you and trust me you won't want to miss it!


Stay tuned……….

Week 1: Laying the Groundwork.......

Ok..it's official..let the GPS begin...and no that doesn't stand for what you think it does although a navigational system to find a mate would be incredible right? GPS=Great Partner Search! I spent a good deal of time at the bookstore today researching which Buru's advice (Buru=Book+Guru remember?), I would follow to acquire date 1 of 100 and the lucky author is a wonderful prodigy of every one's favorite daytime talk show host...have you guessed who yet? Love Smart, by Dr. Phil McGraw promises to teach me how to stop stumbling through my love life and I quote...how to "Bag 'em, tag 'em and take 'em home" Yeeee haw! That sounds a lot like rodeo speak or buying seafood at a fish market but nonetheless I will heed the tips from my first Buru and see where it takes me!

Oh!! Almost forgot..so I came close to landing date #1 today....if only that stop light at 3rd and Gardner by The Grove lasted a little longer because from across the intersection I could tell his eyes said YES!

Stay tuned.......

It's About Time......

Ok...so unless you have been living under a rock or on another planet for the past 7 or 8 years I'm sure the title of my blog sounds vaguely familiar. "Diona Dates The City"...I toyed with different titles and names but for some reason this one seemed to fit best...the Who, What and Where are all pretty clear. The Who is yours truly....Diona...a 30 something bonafide city girl, looking for true love, happiness, and let's face it great sex! The What....well the what is a personal challenge slash social experiment that I wish I had done years ago....are you ready for this one......[drum roll please] attempt to go out on 100 dates by the end of the year!! So let's see...that's 100 dates in 4 months, 2 weeks, and 6 days....not quite a date for everyday of the week..but hopefully enough to land a date for New Year's Eve right?? And finally the Where aka "The City" is Los Angeles...and fyi..I moved to LA from NYC in January...God why didn't I think to do this when I was still living in New York City??? And who will serve as my dating guru/coach/guide for my new found journey you ask?? I will use a different tip or piece of advice from a few of the ever so popular Self-Help Dating books as my guide. "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man", "The Rules", "He's Just Not That Into You", "Why Men Love Bitches", "Love Smart: Find the One you Want - Fix the One you Got" and "Think Like a Guy: How to Get a Guy by Thinking Like One", these are just a handful of popular titles of dating "self help" books, if you will, that promise to debunk dating myths, help us understand the male psyche and set us on the right track to finding the relationship of our dreams, L-O-V-E and the brass or shall I say Platinum ring that comes with it...and some are even "Oprah" worthy..Ha! Think I am finally ready to put all of this advice to the test and see what the universe brings me!!

Next stop Barnes and Noble to get a few books and heed the advice from my new dating 'Buru's' (book+guru) and quite possibly acquire date #1 in the Best Seller aisle...stay tuned..........